You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
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