I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
