I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
