is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
is this the sara with the beer cane?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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