she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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