remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
