you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
