We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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