Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
