Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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