so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
And then my night got REAL pukey
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
