i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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