the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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