***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
its not stalking. its research.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
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