Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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