Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
