I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
