time to smoke my breakfast
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
how drunk are you?
Several
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize