I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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