after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
