Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
