did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
