Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize