I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
