Fine. I'll sleep in my office
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
