he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
