do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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