Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
