I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
