Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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