Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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