It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
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