I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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