She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
