how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
