We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
