I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
