Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
