how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
