Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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