Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
