Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize