You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
