yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Randomize
