how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
