spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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