Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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