What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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