She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
