I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Randomize
